So when somebody with major chronic health problems tells you that they are striving towards a goal, like you are... Do you tell them that basically the stress is too much for them to handle, they should go live on a shelf somewhere and be coddled and not live the way they want to live and decide that they're not allowed to dream as big as everybody else because it might be harder for them? What a fucking crock of shit.

Whoever the hell you are who said that to my friend, I would not think twice about decking you over the GD head at this moment. Who the fuck do you think you are??

It's no wonder I want absolutely nothing to do with people when I leave the house lately. People just feed on being shitty to each other anymore. What a pack of assholes.



...Though I DO enjoy the thunderstorms we've been getting. I locked myself out of the apartment at 8:30 two mornings ago. After 8 hours of sleep, I was still too groggy and stupid to remember to bring my keys with me LOL. By the time my boyfriend came home to let me in, I was sweating and hot, even sitting in the shade. I hate you August.

Anyways, still trying to cram some art into the time I've got left before school takes over my life again. I need to get my oils out again today while the light's good and work on the self portrait some more. I also have finally gotten to the sculpting part of my first sculpture. It's a velociraptor, which I plan on adding feathers and a sweet paint job to when I've got it baked.. maybe some flames along the sides. No? We'll see.

I spent last night looking up Sleep Clinics in my area, checking out costs and whatnot (sleep studies are NOT cheap o.o. I'd say in the last 24 hours, at least 16 of those hours I spent asleep, I'm thinking more like 18 even. That would be more than 2/3 of my day spent unconscious, and I still spend a lot of my time feeling like a nap would be nice. My average this week remains about 12 hours a day. That's still too much.

I've always had trouble getting up and being tired throughout the day. Even when mania strikes and I sleep so much less than usual, it's still like five or six hours... Which is like half of what I'd be doing otherwise. I figure I should get it looked at, if nothing else. I know that I do a lot of jerking and moving around, that's probably all it is. _